And then just being honest about [your expectations], which is really hard for people to do because they think they’re going to scare someone away.But I think that if you could be really open and honest about some of those fears right off the bat…that’s going to save you a lot of time and heartbreak.
Between fuccbois on Tinder and self-esteem killing trolls on social media, the modern dating world can be savage.
That’s why we decided to ask an expert for some millennial dating advice.
People are going on date after date after date and they really want to find a connection, but that takes time, and [their dates] don’t want to go out again or they just want sex.
So I think that if you are going to use [dating apps], my suggestion is to be very upfront and authentic with what your intentions are, and with who you are and what you’re looking for.
AJ: I think that question’s loaded, because there’s so much that they can quote-unquote “do” on the practical end, [for example] maybe avoid Tinder or certain platforms that are instant, instant, instant.
But I think on the emotional end, what I try to help my clients unpack is what is it that they really even want? And how much of that can they provide for themselves?
Sometimes yes, it’s the biological clock, and yes, just feeling lonely.
But another part of it can also be that they just feel that they have to [find someone]; they feel like they’re at this age where everybody else is doing it, everybody else is married, and everybody else has children, so there’s just a lot of pressure.
How often do you go into the gym, or go into the grocery store, or go into the bank and you don’t smile, you don’t have eye contact, you don’t initiate a conversation?
[Instead], be mindful and go into those environments with the intention to be open.
Surprise surprise, says Jeney — it’s the inability to connect deeply with a potential romantic partner.