But if it also coincides with being difficult, dating might be a long, tough road for you. The trick to that is knowing how the man you’re with is perceiving you, and being able to tone down or turn off the traits he might find as reason to dump you for someone more agreeable.
It might mean, however, turning off some of the things that make you “successful” at work. I discovered what you’ve written through taking a self evaluation test.This is a bitter pill to swallow, perhaps even a double standard. I got these lists of great traits for myself: persuasive, risk taker, competitive, pursues change, confident, socially skilled, inspiring, open & direct.But what I realized is there’s a reason they call this the dating “game” and if you want to play, you have to learn the rules.This doesn’t mean I’m not who I am around men, it just means that I use the same skills in my personal life I learned to use in my professional.When I am committed to them and act nice and devoted, they start to look elsewhere. Am I cursed to be alone just because I know how to be kind to women? So how is it that all these successful men are not connecting with all these successful women? Because there’s much more going on than merely a meeting of the minds. The flip side of being analytical is being difficult. The flip side of having moral clarity is being arrogant.
Anyway, in short, I need some serious help and hope to hear back from you soon. I’m what you’d call a “nice guy.” I make a good living, I’m pretty attractive, and I treat women well. Isn’t being nice a Men reading this might empathize with Jason. What never occurs to some women is that: They’re being evaluated on far more than their most “impressive” traits. The flip side of being entrepreneurial is being a workaholic.
In male-female relationships and dating, while many men just want to marry women who are younger than them, some choose older ones for some reasons.
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In fact, all of my female friends comment on what a great catch I am. Women reading this may feel bad for him, yet also want to him to know that it’s not BECAUSE he’s nice that he’s not attracting women. It’s because he constantly seeks the approval of others. It’s because he sacrifices his personal power to be conciliatory. These traits sometimes come with a significant downside that is painful to acknowledge. The flip side of being charismatic is being self-centered.
These are common attributes of nice guys, yet nice guys think that women don’t like nice guys BECAUSE they’re nice. Again, not EVERY person who is bright is opinionated, and not EVERY person who is funny is sarcastic.
When a man goes out with a woman, he’s not as concerned with whether she’s articulate and on track to make partner at the law firm. Listen, I’ve spent my life chasing after women I’ve intellectually admired. They’re not wrong for seeing things I could change. But if that go-getter side ends up emasculating your man, or makes him feel insignificant, or second-guessed, he’s not really getting what he wants out of a partner. ” it’s pretty difficult for us to enjoy our role as men.