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This is the kind of negative spiral my guidelines are designed to protect you against.

As some of you know, I met my own husband online and have coached many women to the altar through online dating alone.

Never use your work phone number, work email, or any other identifying contact information in your online profile.

You may even avoid singles events and other real-life opportunities to meet men because you feel so vulnerable and unsure of yourself.Worse, you may get caught up in a toxic relationship with a man who could have been filtered out from the start.Lots of nice guys lose out at this stage, simply because they hang out with other men all day at work and are a little awkward around girls.While we want to screen out the truly weird or disrespectful, take a second look at men who seem sincere and demonstrate follow-through, but aren’t necessarily suave.Neither is anything overtly sexy or intimate, such as watching videos at his apartment. ) Meeting at a strip club is never appropriate, unless you work there and he is picking you up for the date.

Rule 4: Go by a nickname or middle name for the first 3 dates if it makes you feel safer.Never get overly excited about a date or invest your emotions in a man who hasn’t yet demonstrated, over multiple dates, that he’s in this for the long haul. Although it’s not what the dating sites want you to do, following this rule will spare you the type of date I describe in Rule #14, where the man has mentally checked out before his first beer. I call the DZ a “sandwich” date because you will sandwich it in between other activities, such as working out or meeting friends for dinner.This has several benefits, not the least of which is that a man is likely to ask you out again, for a proper date, if you limit the time spent in this initial meeting.Rule 6: He can’t be certain you’re worth chasing until he meets you in real life.Men don’t fall in love with your accomplishments and favorite movie list—they fall in love with your essence.A man does not need your real, full name until you have gone out several times and you are sure that he is legit.