By the time a child has gotten in trouble for something, they already feel guilty, sorry and embarrassed about it.
This clearly communicates the expectation and the consequence, without a threat.Parents tend to want control all of the time, and it takes work to allow kids to have freedom to do what they choose.You can always rephrase the sentence from a negative to a positive, which will correct the behavior without sounding critical.Train yourself to say what you want them to do instead of what you don’t. Notice the common element is starting with the word “you” and then acknowledging what they worked at, rather than what you think about it.It is wasted words to try to express a rule when a child is upset, as they focus on one thing at a time.
Instead, train yourself to say, “You realized that you jumped off the chair and got hurt when you landed on the ground”, rather than, “See, that is what happens when you jump off the chair”.So, you can say “Walk, please” instead of “No running”. Children are programmed to question, analyze and wonder about situations.I have spent a good deal of time on articles on the difference between Praise vs. This can sometimes present itself in an argumentative manner, but this is actually a normal part of development.Telling a child that they can’t do something makes them prove that they can, by telling you or showing you that it is in fact possible.Telling a kid to not do something makes them want to argue or rebel.The former acknowledges that the child already figured out the problem, but is still comforting.