What I am learning is that if I am too rigid and focus too much attention on what I am "looking" for (and what everything must look like and feel like in that process), I am missing out on allowing myself to experience something special.
One day, after about four dates with a guy, I felt like things were going well and assumed they were moving forward.I thought it was a great time to tell him how I felt and see what happened, but my friend literally removed my phone from my hands warning me that I would "ruin" any potential I had with him by being too honest. I recently relocated to the East Coast, and about two weeks into my time here, I decided to start dating again.This summer is will be one year that I have been single.I started dating on and off back in December, but found it to be tedious, exhausting, challenging and for a lack of better words, completely emotionally brutal.This doesn't mean not communicating or not moving forward into a relationship or into something deeper and more meaningful, but it does mean that the foundation is still based on having fun together.
It's true that more than half of the people on the dating websites (or people participating in any and all kinds of dating) are in fact "looking for that special someone." It's in that fierce search that they actually miss out on connecting with someone who may or may not turn out to be that person.And what I found is that everyone has something different to say.One friend says do this, another friend says do that -- yet nothing seemed to align with how I was really feeling.I even dated a guy who was already married once and had kids from his previous relationship.But what I found was something that I really wasn't expecting.If it feels like the right time to have a conversation, have it.